Friday, 14 January 2011

Day 2: 9 things about me

1. I adore old photographs. Put me in a room with them and you'll almost never get me out. I can't resist looking, reading expressions and body language, wondering what had happened before and what happened to them afterwards. Were they happy? Did they die young? Did their hearts break? Did they imagine what would happen to them, in those pictures where they were young and the world lay before them?

2. When I was about 7, the thought of crossing the equator and being in the Southern Hemisphere would put me on the edge of a panic attack (so, of course, I'd make myself think about it). I couldn't understand how people stood up in Australia - after all, they WERE upside down. The idea of winter in June was just BIZARRE. The idea of being near the bottom of the world without land for thousands of miles made me edgy. But the one that REALLY freaked me out? The Coriolis effect. The idea of water going down the toilet/drain the other way or the thought of watching cyclones spinning the other way on the weather report made me hyperventilate. I was long over that when, at dinner with a couple of friends in winter 2008, a Southern Hemispherean looked up the sky and said, "Orion. Of course, it's upside down." The old panicky feeling came back and I just held back from saying, "DON'T FUCK WITH MY STARS!"

3. I do divisibility rules on licence/registration plate numbers. They have to be at least three digits, of course, which means the UK has been a bit pants for that since 2001, when it changed the format. It relaxes me. My favourite divisibility rule is 7. I also solve quadratic equations at random intervals. I'm a lateral, intuitive thinker by nature - so I find the sequential nature of this relaxing when I'm tired. (Today, I saw 861 on a licence plate and discovered it was divisible by 7. Awesome.)

4. I'm an introvert. This seems to shock a lot of people, because I'm not backwards about coming forwards (read: opinionated) - but I need time alone to recharge. There are people that I can be with when I need that time, but they are very few and far between. I can't be around a whirl of emotions and not snap at someone. My favourite place at a large party is in the kitchen doing something, because it makes it manageable

5. Silver may be considered 'cooler', but I prefer gold or copper - I love their depth and warmth.

6. "Sleep well, dreamer." I loved it when a friend said that the other night, because it's true. I've ALWAYS dreamt often, in colour and vividly - nights where I don't remember snippets of at least three dreams are unusual. I love thinking them through, analysing them, turning them over - and I daydream a lot too. I also believe that the 'people dream in black and white' is an utter crock: if that were true, why wasn't that posited from when we started discussing dreams - Jung? Freud? Our minds recreate our world - and we see the world in colour. Why would we recreate a 1930s film world when what we SEE is colour? I actually believe that on hearing that, people started convincing themselves that's what they did.

7. I love the darkness - long winter nights, moving by intuition, the void - even though it's uncomfortable. Even the parts of it I don't love, I'm fascinated by - hence my addiction to shows like 'Wire in the Blood' and "Criminal Minds". I suspect there's a strong Goth clothing streak in me, though I've never explored that. Wounded men with dark streaks? Bring 'em on. Unrelieved daytime has never done it for me. Though I've always thought I'd have been a clinical psychologist given the chance, I have a hunch I might have gone for forensic.

The siren call of the darkness is never far off.

8. "You're about intimacy and deep connection." All I'd add to that is authenticity, passion and complexity. Most of me is encompassed in that, as evidenced by the fact that my deepest desire is to find my beloved and hold my own children in my arms. And I don't think I can explain it - I think you have to experience it for yourself.

9. "You've got the filthiest laugh, even when it ISN'T a dirty joke." Guilty as charged - and my friends hear it a lot :-D.

Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever).
Day Seven: Four turn-offs.
Day Eight: Three turn-ons.
Day Nine: Two images that describe your life right now, and why.
Day Ten: One confession.

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