The cleric in question shall remain nameless...suffice it to say, he's a good friend.
We were discussing the pros and cons of the internet when...
Cleric: I'm sick of getting emails about penis enlargements.
Me: I know. Me too - and you know how sensitive I am about my penis size.
Cleric: (laughs) Things would have been very different if you had had a penis.
Me: Yes. For one, I'd be Pope by now.
Cleric, in a voice combining long-suffering and horror: Oh. my. God. (gesturing towards my cleavage) Well, it's a good thing He gave you those then.
It's time this bitch got some respect...and her own back: