Stealth sexy...

I felt great about my birthday outfit till I saw pictures of myself sitting down in it. The words 'beached' and 'whale' came to mind, as well as "OHMYGOD, TIME FOR SLIMFAST AND THE GYM!!"

Working on the second, not desperate enough for the first yet - as I've said here before, I love my cleavage, and with Slimfast, it tends to go first. No go. I own way too many tops designed to show it off.

Jack and I were online chatting today, and as ever, he left me feeling happy and protected (despite being my junior by a good number of years). All IM typos are left in:

Jack says (19:21):
once im free again it would be nice to go out with some of you friends from your bday again
Irim says (19:21):
that would be lovely
Jack says (19:22):
cooolo
Irim says (19:22):
once I've lost at least a stone and look decent in photos
Irim says (19:22):
:D
Jack says (19:25):
dude, u looked fucking hot on your bday!
Irim says (19:26):
Awww, you're so sweet!
Jack says (19:26):
serious
Jack says (19:26):
u must have lost a load of weight
Jack says (19:26):
i wasnt just being charming!
Jack says (19:26):
:)
Irim says (19:26):
Actually, I usually wear clothes way too big
Jack says (19:26):
aha
Irim says (19:26):
I was wearing clothes that fit
Jack says (19:27):
one of the "gist is better then the wrappings" eh
Jack says (19:27):
nice
Jack says (19:27):
stealth sexy
Jack says (19:27):
:)
Irim says (19:27):
anything that hangs from my tits means I have a [] inch waist,
Jack says (19:27):
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH
Irim says (19:27):
I love that phrase
Jack says (19:27):
thats fucking funny
Irim says (19:27):
I just think if a guy doesn't look past the surface, it's not worth it
Jack says (19:27):
agreeed
Irim says (19:27):
'stealth sexy'
Irim says (19:28):
might have to blog it.
Jack says (19:28):
do it
Jack says (19:28):
i want ot be quoted
Irim says (19:28):
all right, darling. Do you want to be named?
Jack says (19:28):
fuk yeh

And so, my dear, consider yourself named.

"Stealth sexy". Just like that, he took my wearing big clothes - anchored in the sexual abuse, my mother's complete weirdness about my body in all sorts of ways, and my resulting ambivalence about my body - and turned it into gift wrapping.

Lo, verily, I was healed.